There has been so much going on emotionally in my life right now that I haven’t able to breath. Both girls are down for a nap, so here goes.
2 Friday’s ago, my grandfather went into the hospital for his gallstones. He’s 93 and 1/2 so I dropped everything and went to see him in Ogden. He has been having issues for 2 years now. They widened the bowel tract and were going to send him home on Monday. On Monday they decided to keep him for observation and reevauluate on Wednesday. Thursday morning, I got t he call that they had placed him on hospice. They have upped his morfine dose twice since then. It is only a matter of time, everything in his body is shutting down.
Last night at work was really hard. 5 years ago right before I clocked in at work, I got the call that my grandmother had passed away. Those memories just came flooding back. I haven’t gone down to Ogden to see him again, because I remember how hard it was to watch her at the end. I want to remember him cracking his jokes and being grandpa. I don’t want to remember him in pain.
Sorry for the sobfest. I just needed it to get out there.